Vatican - 030811 |
A few nights ago I had a dream where I noticed my world was falling apart around me. All the balls I juggled were crashing down and I couldn't keep up. At one point I heard in the dream my wife tell me:
I am not going to help you clean up the façades you built around yourself.
That startling statement woke me up. It kept me up thinking about all the façades I put up so people only see a version of me I think I can control and project.
A facade or façade (pronounced /fəˈsɑːd/) is generally one side of the exterior of a building, especially the front, but also sometimes the sides and rear. The word comes from the French language, literally meaning "frontage" or "face".I believe we all wear *brilliant disguises at times. They are different than the **façades we build around ourselves. The disguises hide something and the façades create "truths" and perceptions about what is inside.
In architecture, the facade of a building is often the most important from a design standpoint, as it sets the tone for the rest of the building. Many facades are historic, and local zoning regulations or other laws greatly restrict or even forbid their alteration. - Wikipedia
This dream quote, "I am not going to help you clean up the façades you built around yourself!", told me that I have to quit trying to be so many different "me's" for others. I am getting worn out and just need to be Me. Just Karl.
This new blog is an effort for me to become more WYSIWYG (pronounced whizzeeewig) which stands for What You See Is What You Get. This includes sharing my warts, wrinkles, gray, thinning hair, and hazel eyes. It also makes me own up to all the brilliant disguises and façades I've worn or built up. I am not offering total transparency into all of my life. Honestly, do you really need to know if I pee standing or sitting? I am not aiming to be like Charlie Sheen and self-implode by sharing all my lunacy. I don't have enough vices or money to reach his level of new "transparency". I also don't have "Adonis DNA and tiger blood" in me. I've just got Karl DNA and Karl blood in me and guess what - that is good enough.
*One of my favorite songs by Bruce Springsteen (watch and listen below).
** I know I can spell it "facade", but the cool little "ç" makes it much richer.
Karl, love the video. I am going to have to think about differences between disguises and facades. I guess a facade is meant to be permanent whereas a disguise is a temporary costume. A facade is necessary for protection of what is behind it, our vulnerable selves. Since great architecture would tell us a facade is necessary and beautiful, I have a hard time seeing this as bad.
ReplyDeleteVery thought provoking.
Carla, very good point. I think facades are similar to sex, drugs, and rock and roll. None of them are good or bad, it is the intent and the use that can make them bad or good.
ReplyDeleteSome of my facades are fabrications to placate others so they don't have to deal with me. I think these types of facades can be good and/or bad. Maybe I am getting to a point where I don't care if people know what is inside me. If they are interested enough to look inside, maybe they should see the truth.